What Asking Five Boys to Prom Taught Me About "No"

Yours truly circa 2000 with Harmless Boy

20 years ago in New Jersey, I was an awkward, introverted high school senior. 

Even though I had zero popularity, I asked five boys to go to the prom with me.

They all said no. 

I went to prom, stag. And had the most wonderful time dancing with friends.

(One of the boys agreed to pose in the picture with me. He was harmless.)

Five no's didn't mean I was rejected. Or that I wasn't good enough for prom. 

My willingness to hear no meant I was gutsy and brave. That I accepted myself.

It's the same in our careers. 

Hearing no is part of the process for career success. Par for the course for the gutsy and brave.

For one of my clients, hearing no turned into a prestigious industry award and prize income. 

Initially, she wanted to get promoted. 

But when her boss said, "Not this quarter," she didn't give up. 

Instead, she asked, "How can I make my case stronger for the next quarter?" 

Boss suggested campaigning for the award. 

I coached her to see that hearing no is not a sign she's doing it wrong. 

She's doing it right. Having the tough conversations. Taking risks.

Her willingness to hear no led to winning awards and the recognition of her peers, her industry. 

AND she's now closer to the promotion than before. 

So, if you're in the middle of collecting no's, consider you might be right on track. 

Be willing to hear more no's.

The more you're willing to hear no, the more you'll advocate for yourself.

The better you advocate, the more you'll be able to SAY no. And honor boundaries around your time and resources like the boss that you are.

Ask and hear more no's.

Embrace saying more no's.

You'll be better than okay. You'll become a better negotiator and a better leader. You'll become gutsy and brave.

If you want to be hearing and saying no in a more strategic way, so that every no gets you CLOSER to, not further from the path to promotion, I can help you.

Book your 1-hour consult today.

As your coach, I will help you create a new relationship with "no" so that you get promoted and better paid in six months or less.