3 Reasons Why You Have Negotiation Anxiety and How to Fix it

For so many of us women, negotiating for the career we want is soul-expanding work.

It takes --

• the COURAGE to heal wounds from cutting ourselves down to get along in a world biased against women

• the GUTS to expand our capacity to receive, when our socialized habit had been to give, give, and give

• and FAITH in our future self that she will deliver on our bold promises and be the brave leader we want to see

You soul knows you're meant for EXPANSION, and that's why you want to grow personally and professionally.

But your brain tells a different story when it thinks about actually engaging in negotiation.

To the primitive brain, or the part of us that would rather binge-watch K-drama on Netflix all day rather than brave a 10-minute conversation with a manager...this work is akin to death.

Not literally of course. But figuratively.

Except our brains don't know the difference between real and fiction, literal and figurative.

So your nervous system gets activated at the thought of having that conversation, and you have anxiety: a racing heart, sweaty palms, or a tight sensation in your chest.

Here are things to remember when you're in the grips of negotiation anxiety:



1. Your survival is not at threat.

Discussing your promotability, equity or cash compensation, or a remote work schedule is simply talking.

Even if you talk awkwardly...

Even if they say, "not now"...

You will survive.

When you brave having the talk, while anxious, you set yourself up to THRIVE.

Because even if you get a no, saying what you want brings what you want into the realm of possibility.

Case in point, I've once asked for a 25% raise and was told no.

Half a year later, when the startup I was at raised money, I got that 25% raise.



2. This isn't about getting liked. It's about the VALUE you bring.

A woman VP I coach told me she believes her position and six-figure salary "landed on her lap," because her bosses like her.

So she felt anxious to, for once, not play second fiddle to everyone else's wants, but to ask for what she wants from a place of power.

I told her, "You're mistaken about your source of power.

"You have what you have because of the VALUE you bring.

"If you weren't bringing value, you wouldn't be VP, no matter how much the executives like you."



3. Anxiety is normal. It doesn't erase your power.

The only reason you don’t feel confident yet is because you lack the practice of negotiating for yourself.

You’ve negotiated countless times for your employer, for others.

You’ve demonstrated your power and will do it again.

Simply by transferring those negotiating skills FOR YOU.



Like my clients, you too can transmute this anxiety into COURAGE + GUTS to see yourself in a new light and negotiate from power.

Combine this with FAITH in yourself and you have CONFIDENCE that makes you compelling as a leader.

If this is what you want, I'm here to help.

My 1:1 coaching container is where we do the work that expands your soul and up-levels your career.

To get started, you're invited to book your free consult today.

In this 1:1 conversation, you will be guided through an in-take so I know where you are and where you want to go.

From there, I'll help you bridge the gap, so you know exactly how you will achieve your career goal by learning to negotiate and lead, with the support of an expert coach in your corner.

Talk soon,

Jamie